Black Friday Special

In honor of the biggest shopping day of the year, I thought I’d write my own Black Friday Special- an early Functional Friday, that is!

For as long as I can remember, I have dedicated the Friday after Thanksgiving to joining the masses in search for the best deals and perfect gifts for my loved ones. While we were always there for a deal, we were never the ones aggressively snagging a TV or $19.99 boots, but there were times when we would wake up at 3 and 4 o’ clock in the morning and would shop until 11 and 12 o’ clock at night, well past my current 9:30 pm bedtime!

This year is a little different for us; traveling with an almost 2 year old is tough so we decided to host an intimate, COVID-friendly Thanksgiving dinner here with my in-laws. It was a perfect day but I will say, I missed celebrating with my mom, sister, and the rest of the family. And, because of COVID, we are choosing to forego the Black Friday crowds all together, spending time relaxing as a family and decorating for Christmas (with a little online shopping, if I’m being honest). As I sit here clicking “Add Item to Cart” and enjoying some hard-to-come-by quiet moments, I’ve also been reflecting on how beautifully resilient my mom has been with her vision loss, still maintaining her desire to be on the go. As silly as it sounds, I sit here wishing we were together shopping today, because for a large majority of those shopping trips I was talking about, my mom was (still is) my partner in crime. Not only do we share the same gene responsible for RP, we also share the same shopping gene. You guys, this woman can SHOP and I got it from my momma, y’all.

When I was younger, my dad accompanied us on our shopping trips, graciously chauffeuring us wherever we wanted. Oftentimes, he would humor our requests, taking us for day trips to Pigeon Forge or Charlotte for some major outlet shopping. My dad, in his blue jeans and white New Balances, would shop with us for a while but always ended up finding his way to a coffee shop, buying an overpriced coffee and people watching while mom and I found all the deals.

In my early teens, my mom and I would usually part ways in a store; she’d carefully browse the aisles, searching for the perfect gift, while I’d shop in another section (probably for myself). With time, especially after my dad’s passing in 2016, her vision began to decline more and more, requiring me to shop with her and eventually for her. Even with little to no vision, and the anxiety that accompanies it, she still maintains this “heck yea, let’s go,” attitude and that is exactly what we do!

This is where “Functional Friday” comes in; as her vision has deteriorated over the years, our love for shopping has remained, but the strategies we use have changed. As you go about your holiday shopping this season, I wanted to share the Sighted Guide techniques we use to still carry on our shopping spree traditions.

A Sighted Guide technique, also known as a Human Guide, is a way in which a person who is sighted safely and efficiently walks with and guides a person without vision. My mom and I are the type of sighted guide pair who is able to communicate non-verbally and I am used to the types of verbal/non-verbal cues she needs and appreciates. When we are shopping in a store with carts, she will push the cart and I will stand on the right side, guiding us through the aisles. If we are in a store without carts, she prefers to hold my purse and I act as her sighted guide. While each person will prefer a different technique, below are some general recommendations for being a sighted guide.

General Tips:

• Never grab or pull the person with vision impairment; rather, lead them in a fluid manner, the same way you’d naturally walk.

• Relax your arm by your side and allow the person with vision impairment to hold your arm above the elbow. (I like to explain that they should hold your arm in the same way they'd hold a glass of milk....or wine). It is likely the person you are guiding will have an arm preference (My mom always walks on my left side). They should follow a half-step behind, with your shoulders overlapping, in anticipation for upcoming challenges.

• ALWAYS maintain good communication with the person you are guiding; this enables them to better understand their surroundings. Describe your surroundings using accurate and descriptive phrases.

• Remember, you, as the sighted guide, are TWO people wide. Account for the space needed for two people rather than one. If you are approaching a narrow passageway, inform your partner that you are approaching a tight space. You should move your guide arm behind your back so that your partner can stand directly behind you to pass through.

• Remember that steps, ramps, and escalators can cause significant anxiety for those with vision loss. When approaching these obstacles, slow down before going up or down and approach them so that your are square to the step. Inform your partner EXACTLY what you are about to do. "We are going to go down 4 steps" or "We are about to go up 6 steps." Allow them to use your arm on one side and the handrail on the other side if able. Always inform your partner when you have reached the top or bottom of the stairs, escalator, or ramp.

Shopping Tips:

• Include the person you're shopping with in your experiences as appropriate. For example, my mom loves when I explain to her the items I am seeing. I will read the funny coffee mugs, explain patterns or designs on items, and just generally describe the environment we are in. It makes her feel more involved in the shopping experience rather than just being "along for the ride."

• Keep the person you're shopping with involved by using their other senses. When my mom and I are shopping together, I will often have her feel the softness of a sweater or blanket or have her smell a candle or lotion. I will oftentimes hand her an item so she can feel the details for herself.

• Always tell your partner the exact price of the item. Keep in mind, they are relying on you for their visual input and it is a courtesy to provide them with the exact amount they will be spending.

While you're out and about this holiday season, shop local, wear your mask, wash your hands, and be a great sighted guide! I hope these little tips help you enjoy your holiday shopping experiences as much as my mom and I enjoy shopping together!

For more information about how to be a sighted guide, contact your local department for the visually impaired or reach out to your Primary Care Physician or Ophthalmologist for a Low Vision OT referral.

Disclaimer: Please remember that while I am an Occupational Therapist, I am not your Occupational Therapist. Please keep in mind, these recommendations are meant to be extremely generalized and are strategies that have worked for my loved ones with vision loss. Additionally, I have no affiliation or connection to any product or brand mentioned in my post.